As you can see, IT'S over... To those who know, please dont say anything...
She couldn't accept me for who I am and not at the same time. And so we broke up. It hurt me. ALOT. But it is my fault because I could not change myself to fit her preference. I feel so sad... Does anyone understand how it feels like to always manage to get into a relationship but always be the one to get dumped? I dont think so... I want to get drunk... BUT! I have made a promise to 2 very important people in my life that I wouldn't get drunk ever again... So I'll keep that promise.
OH, THE ANGER TOWARDS MYSELF!
OH, THE PAIN!
IT HURTS TOO MUCH!
If any Taekwondo Club members from my school dont see me tomorrow, Im most probably dead already...
Good bye, oh painful and meaningless life.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Thursday, June 18, 2009
TIRED!
Today was so freaking tiring... I slept at 12.30am this morning. And I managed to get up because I purposely put my phone far enough for me to have to get up and turn off the alarm which would definitely insure me awaking from my slumber.
Then I went to school like normal and had classes.... At 11.50a.m. Yuen Wei, Jeanne and I were called out for a meeting. The meeting called to give a briefing about our Prefect's Installation and who is in the Installation Comittee. Im in charge of getting the PA.... Sucks much... Hopefully it's easy...
THEN, after school I went to Jason's house, had lunch, went to Jon Zhen's place to play badminton, had fun while playing, swam in the pool at JZ's condominium with Jason, Tiek Yi and Jon Zhen himself, had even more fun while we were in the pool and then went back home extremely tired...(Fun meaning actual fun. For those who are thinking sick, please change your way of thinking.)
Im so tired until I dont wanna do my homework anymore and I also dont wanna go to school tomorrow... BUT! Someone important to me is going to tell me something that could very well end my life tomorrow. So I have to go. I believe that is all. Have a good day/night. Goodbye.
Then I went to school like normal and had classes.... At 11.50a.m. Yuen Wei, Jeanne and I were called out for a meeting. The meeting called to give a briefing about our Prefect's Installation and who is in the Installation Comittee. Im in charge of getting the PA.... Sucks much... Hopefully it's easy...
THEN, after school I went to Jason's house, had lunch, went to Jon Zhen's place to play badminton, had fun while playing, swam in the pool at JZ's condominium with Jason, Tiek Yi and Jon Zhen himself, had even more fun while we were in the pool and then went back home extremely tired...(Fun meaning actual fun. For those who are thinking sick, please change your way of thinking.)
Im so tired until I dont wanna do my homework anymore and I also dont wanna go to school tomorrow... BUT! Someone important to me is going to tell me something that could very well end my life tomorrow. So I have to go. I believe that is all. Have a good day/night. Goodbye.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Up and Up, by Relient K
This song is so nice! I got it from Ashikin during the holidays. It makes me feel really really happy. Unfortunately, I dont know how to add a music player on my blog... So go download it! Here are the lyrics...
Yesterday,
Is not quite what it could have been,
As were most of all the days before.
But I swear today,
With every breathe Im taking in,
I'll be trying to make it so much more.
Cause it seems i get so hung up on,
The history of what's gone wrong,
And the hope of a new day is sometimes hard to see *hard to see*
But Im finally catching onto it,
And yeah the past is just a conduit,
And the light there at the end is where I'll be.
=Chorus=
Cause Im on the up and up,
Im on the up and up,
And I havent given up,
Given up on what,
I know Im capable of.
Yeah Im on the up and up,
Yeah there's nothing left to prove,
Cause im just trying to be a better version of me for you,
A better version of me for you.
To be prosperous,
Would not require much of me,
You see contentment is the one thing it entails.
To content with where I am,
And getting where I need to be,
Im moving past the past where I have failed.
But Im finally catching onto it,
And yeah the past is just a conduit,
And the light there at the end is where I'll be.
*CHORUS*
You never cease to supply
Me with what I need to live a good life.
So when Im down I'll hold my head up high.
Cause you're the reason why...
*CHORUS*
Yesterday,
Is not quite what it could have been,
As were most of all the days before.
But I swear today,
With every breathe Im taking in,
I'll be trying to make it so much more.
Cause it seems i get so hung up on,
The history of what's gone wrong,
And the hope of a new day is sometimes hard to see *hard to see*
But Im finally catching onto it,
And yeah the past is just a conduit,
And the light there at the end is where I'll be.
=Chorus=
Cause Im on the up and up,
Im on the up and up,
And I havent given up,
Given up on what,
I know Im capable of.
Yeah Im on the up and up,
Yeah there's nothing left to prove,
Cause im just trying to be a better version of me for you,
A better version of me for you.
To be prosperous,
Would not require much of me,
You see contentment is the one thing it entails.
To content with where I am,
And getting where I need to be,
Im moving past the past where I have failed.
But Im finally catching onto it,
And yeah the past is just a conduit,
And the light there at the end is where I'll be.
*CHORUS*
You never cease to supply
Me with what I need to live a good life.
So when Im down I'll hold my head up high.
Cause you're the reason why...
*CHORUS*
TODAY
was and still is frustrating... Dont ask why...
We had our Interact Club's AGM today.
CONGRATULATIONS! To all those who made it to the board of course...
As for those who wanted a post but did not get any post at all, look at yourself in the mirror and think: 'Why didn't that many people vote for me? What's wrong with me?'
Dont think it's because the other person who got the post you wanted is better than you... Cause that isn't the case. It's most probably because there is something about the way you speak or act in front of people that doesnt really make people side you. Think about what's wrong about yourself and change from there. Hope this method works for you.
We had our Interact Club's AGM today.
CONGRATULATIONS! To all those who made it to the board of course...
As for those who wanted a post but did not get any post at all, look at yourself in the mirror and think: 'Why didn't that many people vote for me? What's wrong with me?'
Dont think it's because the other person who got the post you wanted is better than you... Cause that isn't the case. It's most probably because there is something about the way you speak or act in front of people that doesnt really make people side you. Think about what's wrong about yourself and change from there. Hope this method works for you.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
TODAY
was a very tiring day.... But all because I slept at 4a.m. this morning... LOL
I was late for duty because i woke up at 7... I thought I was gonna be late for school!
My buttocks still have a nice blue colored line there... AND! It still hurts.
Anyways, as I was saying, I thought I was gonna be late for school. BUT, I reached school 5 minutes before the bell rang. Which means that I didmy morning duty for only 5 minutes so to all prefects of SMK Taman S.E.A.... BE JEALOUS! MUAHAHA!
I slept in En. Tey's class again... Just like yesterday... CAUSE I WAS SO F$%^#*^NG SLEEPY!
Note to self: Never drink sake when you are doing your homework.
That is all for now......
I was late for duty because i woke up at 7... I thought I was gonna be late for school!
My buttocks still have a nice blue colored line there... AND! It still hurts.
Anyways, as I was saying, I thought I was gonna be late for school. BUT, I reached school 5 minutes before the bell rang. Which means that I didmy morning duty for only 5 minutes so to all prefects of SMK Taman S.E.A.... BE JEALOUS! MUAHAHA!
I slept in En. Tey's class again... Just like yesterday... CAUSE I WAS SO F$%^#*^NG SLEEPY!
Note to self: Never drink sake when you are doing your homework.
That is all for now......
Your choice to accept me or not.
According to my first post, I have split personalities(which is seriously true, those who really know me will get what I'm saying).
Alot of people cant accept this other side of mine because I change from a mean and sick minded person into (according to quite a number of friends) a caring guy... I can understand how you feel. I think... But I definitely undersrtand why you cant accept me as the 2 people at the same time. So it's fine. I expect it from everyone....
All I want is someone who can really accept me for who I am. Danush Li Meng Parameswaran, 2 personalities stuck in one body.
Im confused.....
Alot of people cant accept this other side of mine because I change from a mean and sick minded person into (according to quite a number of friends) a caring guy... I can understand how you feel. I think... But I definitely undersrtand why you cant accept me as the 2 people at the same time. So it's fine. I expect it from everyone....
All I want is someone who can really accept me for who I am. Danush Li Meng Parameswaran, 2 personalities stuck in one body.
Im confused.....
Monday, June 15, 2009
THANK YOU!!!
OMG! Thanks Jo Yee! You helped me so much on this blog... If it weren't for you, then all the gadgets wouldn't be around... SO....
T
H
A
N
K
Y
O
U
T
H
A
N
K
Y
O
U
Oh the pain... Does anyone understand at all?
I finally made a blog! lol.
Well as you can see from the title of my blog, I made this blog so i can share my pain with the world. Well, maybe not share, but at least I can tell people about it... Im also doing this because I have no one to turn to right now. Because no one can accept me for who I am, for I am Mask, Mask is me. I am one of two people stuck in one body. Weird right? But very very very true.
I wish I knew what i wanted. I dont know which side to throw and which to keep... One side is over-sensitive, cowardly, unable to control his own emotions but cares about everyone and everything that happens to his friends. The other is a sick headed, perverted, brave idiot.... Help me. For I am confused between these personalities which both have pros and cons.
HELP ME PLEASE!
Well as you can see from the title of my blog, I made this blog so i can share my pain with the world. Well, maybe not share, but at least I can tell people about it... Im also doing this because I have no one to turn to right now. Because no one can accept me for who I am, for I am Mask, Mask is me. I am one of two people stuck in one body. Weird right? But very very very true.
I wish I knew what i wanted. I dont know which side to throw and which to keep... One side is over-sensitive, cowardly, unable to control his own emotions but cares about everyone and everything that happens to his friends. The other is a sick headed, perverted, brave idiot.... Help me. For I am confused between these personalities which both have pros and cons.
HELP ME PLEASE!
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